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Home >> News & Events >> Newsletter Archive >> April-May 2007 >> Jessie & Alyssa

A MENTORING RELATIONSHIP GROWS

By Jessie O'Neil and Alyssa

About the Relationship

It’s ALL about relationships. “The first time that I met Kemisha I didn’t like her. Until the next day she started calling me “sister,” we had a close bond ever since.We went through “ups and downs,” “smiles and frowns,” but that still didn’t stop me from loving her. By calling Kemisha my sister I mean that I could trust her; that she was there for me when I had a problem. I had a closer bond with Kemisha than any of the other girls in the house because she understood me and she was my first roommate. If I never met Kemisha I wouldn’t be what I am today.”

Kemisha lived with Alyssa at the group home I volunteered at. Although I am still a mentor for Alyssa, the home has since been closed down, and the girls, including Kemisha and Alyssa, are currently in different foster homes and other facilities. However, this unfortunate fact has not altered the impact of Alyssa’s relationship with her “sister.” Although the resources and facilities available to Alyssa will continue to change, the relationships she has gained will endure. This was and continues to be my goal in volunteering with Create Now!. Creative expression and in particular, poetry, was my key to engaging Alyssa, our relationship is what has made the difference.

A month after I began volunteering with Create Now!, Alyssa told me that the poetic expression she once loved, she now hated. While I was obviously disheartened, I did not ask any questions, but rather proceeded with my writing program as usual. Every Friday afternoon I continued to come to the house and talk to the girls about their week. Once in a while, I would have the unique opportunity to read a poem or story that they had written. I was patient because I knew that I could not win their trust overnight. The staff would always thank me for being so dedicated and flexible with my commitment to the girls. As much I knew I was making difference, I was determined to do more. Alyssa may have abandoned poetry, but I knew that she could not ignore her passion for long.

 

Jessie and Alyssa at Disney Concert Hall

One night I took Alyssa to see the movie "Freedom Writers," a film about a high school English teacher who inspires marginalized youth to write about their circumstances. I cannot put into words what I felt on the ride home, listening to Alyssa rave about how much she liked the film. The movie also talks about the students visiting the Museum of Tolerance, reading “The Diary of Anne Frank,” and raising money to have the woman who gave shelter to Anne speak at their school. I couldn’t help but smile when Alyssa admitted, “I want to do that!” Her reactions were a testament to the power of art. For Alyssa, the film wasn’t just entertaining, it was empowering. To see that young people in similar situations to her own could rise above their circumstances and make a difference, not only in their own lives, but in the lives of others, sparked something in Alyssa. Although she hasn’t fallen back in love with poetry quite yet, it was then that I think she realized why I had come into her life.

Volunteering with youth who are being shifted from group home to foster home and back again isn’t an easy task, but certainly a worthwhile one. There are moments such as my movie night with Alyssa that all the hard work and determination pays off, much more than you could ever expect. I continue to visit Alyssa at her foster home on a weekly basis. Her words are also shared in this article. I would not have had this profound and fulfilling experience without her, so it is only appropriate that we both express ourselves about our time together. When I sat down to write this article with Alyssa, she dictated to me much more than what is written here. This week she told me that she can not wait to write more. I have always held the belief that everyone has beautiful creative abilities to share. I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to help Alyssa realize her own.

“When I first came to the house I didn’t think there was going to be anybody from my culture there. I was AWOL-ing, ditching school, doing drugs, and telling everybody that they weren’t in charge of me. Until I found out that there were people there who actually cared about me, I didn’t think that anything would change. They told me that they loved me and wanted me to do better for myself. When they first told me that, I was still doing bad. One day there was a restraining order on me and my dad and I decided that I needed to change stuff about my life to go home, and I did. Ever since then I took “baby steps” and continued to do well. Then I found out that my sister, Kemisha, moved out. She said that she was going to be there for me for my birthday and she wasn’t. I felt like I was lied to. I haven’t talked to her since. I cried for two weeks straight when that happened. I felt like I couldn’t trust anybody again. But then I realized that I had to move on. There are other people that care for you and you need to give them a chance.”

About the Mentor

Jessie came to Create Now! in September 2006. As a senior at Chapman University, she is pursuing a Bachelor of Arts in Peace Studies. Jessie wanted to mentor a group of girls in creative writing, so Create Now! arranged for her to teach a workshop in a group home in Mission Viejo. Create Now! provides opportunities for Jessie and Alyssa to experience culture in Los Angeles, such as a recent visit to Disney Concert Hall to hear the American Youth Symphony.  We'll continue to support their mentoring relationship in many different ways.